


A Captain By Any Other Name

by TheAuthorWishesToRemainAnonymous



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Boys Being Boys, Comedy, Drabble, Gen, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 18:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16331060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAuthorWishesToRemainAnonymous/pseuds/TheAuthorWishesToRemainAnonymous
Summary: How the Captain gained, and subsequently lost, a nickname in the space of one week.





	A Captain By Any Other Name

**Author's Note:**

> Quick bit of trashy silliness written as a favour/request.

**MONDAY**

 

It started as part of the endless exchange of trivial, ephemeral 'inside jokes' between Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. The murmured comments exchanged behind their hands and in corners whilst changing in the club room, between warm-ups, taking water breaks, sweeping up the gym, or any other moment when they weren't required to be at full attention. So numerous, now, that the pair had almost developed their own verbal shorthand – a micro-language full of familiar terms and phrases but somehow still inscrutable and foreign to outside ears. In their private conversations, Daichi had become known simply as “Daddy”.

 

“There was that time he literally threatened to have Takeda-sensei turn the bus around ...”

 

“When do you think he's going to make Ukai sit down and smoke a whole carton of cigarettes, to try and teach him a lesson?”

 

“He yelled at Nishinoya-senpai for messing with the air-con settings yesterday. Daddy's on a tear this week.”

 

“Daddy's not **angry** , he's just very disappointed ...”

 

“You two should be more respectful of the captain.”

 

The pair turned around from the bathroom sinks, and then looked down to meet Hinata's questioning gaze. “Do you guys really call him 'Daddy' behind his back? That's mean ...”

 

“Are we wrong?” Tsukishima countered coolly, blunt and cutting as ever. “Did he or did he not put you and his-highness-the-king in time-out before you even joined the team?”

 

Yamaguchi proved to be, as per usual, the more diplomatic of the pair. “It's just a joke, but more like … a term of endearment? He's so responsible and more grown up than the rest of us, and he tries to look after everyone. So he's like everyone's dad in that way.”

 

“Plus, he tells the most **painfully** unfunny jokes.” Yamaguchi could only sigh, because Tsukki was _hopeless_.

 

 

**TUESDAY**

 

Predictably, it seemed Hinata hadn't been able to keep his mouth shut, and passed word of their bit of fun at Sawamura's expense along to their first-year setter. Less predictably, it was Kageyama who sent the whole thing viral.

 

It was a sloppy mistake; he and Daichi both went for the same receive, and briefly collided, Tobio stepping on the captain's foot. “I'm sorry, Daddy,” he was quick to apologise, not immediately registering why everyone else was laughing or why Sawamura's ears had turned red.

 

“Don't mind! Stay focused!” Suga called out from the other side of the court, whilst shooting silencing glares at their teammates. He knew this team well enough to recognize how quickly and easily they could get distracted and devolve into juvenile chaos.

 

Hinata, believing he was 'helping', only exacerbated the situation ten minutes later. He felt a _little_ responsible, since he'd been the one to tell Tobio about the nickname during maths this morning. He also believed it would be less embarrassing for Kageyama if he wasn't the only one to make the faux pas. He therefore proceeded to shout “Nice one, Daddy!” at the top of his lungs as soon as Daichi scored another point.

 

Again, the captain's awkward discomfort was an almost tangible thing as the colour rose in his neck and ears. This, of course, meant the game was on amongst the first years. As the afternoon wore on, Tsukishima seemed the best at it, as he proved he was the only one who could keep it up with a [mostly] straight face.

 

 

**WEDNESDAY**

 

Picking up on the emerging meme, and refusing to be left out of the fun, Tanaka and Noya had joined in by the following day, even going to the extent of adding newly-printed name-tags to the captain's locker, his gym bag, his water bottle, and any other item they could get hold of. In the club room before practice, they even made a point of asking for training advice.

 

“Daddy, what would you say is an appropriate bed-time the night before a game?”

 

“I heard shaving makes you faster. You should show us all how to shave, Daddy.”

 

By the end of the afternoon, they'd even dragged the rest of the second years, as well as Yachi, into the habit. Noya had offered the assistant manager 500 yen to make a few **tiny** edits to the team schedule, assuring her it was all in the spirit of team-building and camaraderie and she absolutely would not get into any trouble.

 

“Daddy, if we do all our chores and clean the gym, can we get pork buns after?” Narita piped up just before they were dismissed.

 

For his part, Daichi had tried his best to ignore and shrug off the silliness, assuming the game would die out as quickly as it had begun. As it continued to spread throughout the team, however, he debated whether simply playing into it wouldn't be a better strategy. Surely, if the 'fun' of embarrassing him were taken away, they'd all get bored and the joke would lose its appeal.

 

“If that's how you all want to spend your allowance this week, fine,” he replied warmly, “But don't spoil your dinner.”

 

It didn't work, only serving to send the entire flock of Karasuno crows into uproarious laughter. He even caught their Ace breaking into a grin. Traitor.

 

 

**THURSDAY**

 

By now, it was starting to go too far; Tsukishima's sharp tongue was the first to cross the line. He'd replied to the request to go and work on his receives with Yamaguchi with a simple “Yes, Daddy.” When the captain gave him a pointed **look** in reply – was this kind of casual insubordination really necessary? - his own golden eyes glittered with malicious humour. “What? You're going to turn me over your knee to teach me a lesson?”

 

The lanky middle-blocker took advantage of the fact that Sawamura was momentarily shocked into speechlessness to quickly head over to his designated corner, where Yamaguchi was already waiting, eyes wide with a mixture of fear and awe. “Oh **Jesus** , Tsukki, you didn't!”

 

“No, 'Jesus' is over there spiking His Majesty's serves,” he retorted with a languid shrug, prompting Tadashi to all but _collapse_ in a fit of giggling. It was contagious, and Tsukishima found himself snickering too, half out of amusement, half out of the guilty discomfort of knowing he'd just been unacceptably disrespectful to his senpai.

 

“Both of you! Ten laps! Now!” the captain barked out their usual punishment for being disruptive during practice. If they had enough spare breath for gossiping and giggling, they weren't working hard enough.

 

 

**FRIDAY**

 

Tsukishima's remark the day before had all but kicked off a minor mutiny. All of them now, seemed determined to outdo one another, as the 'Daddy' comments grew more and more immature and inappropriate. Tanaka and Noya had taken to moaning like AV models every time he touched the ball during practice. “Just like that, Daddy! Oh YES, Daddy! DO IT HARDER, DADDY!”

 

Daichi was at risk of losing control of his team completely, and his frustration must have been written all over his face. As he sat on a bench during their mid-practice water break, Suga approached and stood behind him, instinctively moving to try and massage some of the tension out of his shoulders for him. “You know, they only tease you like this because they love you so much … Daddy.”

 

The final word was murmured against his ear as one of his vice-captain's hands crept around his waist to give a well-toned thigh a firm squeeze. Sawamura turned a brighter shade of red than he had done at any other point in the week, and choked back the awkward gasp that caught in his throat.

 

“Kiyoko wanted to discuss next week's schedule with you. Go talk to her out in the hall,” Koushi instructed him, offering an encouraging punch to the shoulder.

 

Five minutes later, when he returned to the gym, Suga was, as always, all bright smiles and calm confidence. The same could not be said for the rest of the team, who appeared at best decidedly guilty and shame-faced, at worst utterly shell-shocked. Yamaguchi's face was chalk-white; Hinata had all but turned _green_. Even Tanaka had gone into his quiet and composed 'monk mode'.

 

All of Karasuno were incredibly respectful for the rest of practice, referring to him only as 'Sir', 'Captain', or 'Senpai'. He didn't want to question Suga's methods, didn't even want to know what his vice captain had said or done or threatened. Needless to say, the word 'Daddy' was never heard on the court again.

 


End file.
